Sick & Tired


Not only have I literally been sick & tired (almost) all year, I’m also completely sick & tired emotionally regarding singleness. (*definitely picked this picture so I can look like I’m a crazy cat lady!)

Let me be very clear though- I am not tired or sick of being single. I AM completely over being treated as a lesser than sister-in- Christ because of my relationship status. Anyone else feel this way?

Married people are not more complete than I am. There is sanctification in singleness, just as there is in marriage. Whenever a married couple starts saying how santifying marriage is, I nod, but I also want to shout, “SO IS SINGLENESS!”

Having a spouse does not, automatically, mean you are closer to Christ. Being in a relationship, engaged, or married is not a signifier that you must be ‘good with God.’ So many people have told me grow closer to Christ, and he will provide you a man. GUESS WHAT WEIRDOS, HE ALREADY DID! He provided Himself! CHRIST! Growing closer to Christ is the reward! That should be your goal when reading the Bible, praying, singing His praise- to grow your relationship with Him, not to pretend to want to know Him more in order to get a dude.

Being single does not mean we are second class citizens (even though sometimes it feels that way).

I have a super, sweet, recently married friend who came to church in a long-distance engagement. After her wedding, and when her groom moved to New Mexico and started attending church with her, she revealed to me that people at church started talking to her and inviting them for dinner. She was shocked that most of these church members asked if she was new to the church, even though she had been attending for almost a year, and joined the church months prior to her wedding. They never saw her before, in her (and my) opinion because she was single. It never crossed their minds to invite a single brother or sister to their home for dinner, or out for coffee. She was invisible until married. This dear friend really appreciates experiencing this because she now has a larger, more genuine heart, for the singles in our church– she’s the first to invite them to traditionally ‘couples only’ events.  ❤

Leaders can be single. Leaders in the church can be single (*cough*cough* Paul? anyone?). Why don’t we see more single people in leadership positions? Are they not stepping up? Are they not being asked? Are they even being seen?

This is just a rant. I love my church with every molecule of my single-being. I love my friends. I love my community. I’m just tired over people assuming I’m desperate to be married… there is nothing wrong with being single.


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