I Am Not Enough

(This title has nothing to do with looks or overall self-worth- you are valuable.)

Today I woke upon the wrong side of the bed. Literally and figuratively. Literally, because rolling over to the other side was easier than pushing Dolce Dog off. Figuratively, I have no idea why. I was excited to be getting breakfast with my sister, but overwhelmed with spending a day off with people.

Well let’s just say the morning didn’t go as planned, and I didn’t like that. I dramatically left my sister’s apartment in tears. I text two of my closest friends, but neither was available right away. As I drove off, I felt like turning to God, but then part of me rebelled and just turned on the radio.

I drove to my parents. Lanay called me to talk some love into me, but my nephew kept yelling into my ear- so I was pretty distracted. I do know Lanay’s advice was Godly. I do know that I didn’t like it.

The day was basically a day of me avoiding God and trying to turn to others. I went to Gayle’s work to drop off some bridal shower invites, while there I was hoping another friend would be able to hang. She wasn’t. So I called another friend. She wasn’t available either.

When I got to my apartment I just kept repeating over and over “Go to Jesus, Go to Him.” I washed dishes. BUT FINALLY HE WON. I opened up “Jesus Calling,” to today’s devotional. I am so glad I did.

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, ”

-James 1:2

“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”

-2 Corinthians 12:9

While I am not thrilled that I feel less than worthy today, and while I don’t like feeling second. I began today with ‘inadequate resources’ and I didn’t rely on Jesus. Instead this morning I just rushed through my day and felt sorry for myself. The moment I realized I was feeling like poop I should have taken a few minutes to rest in Him. I am weak, but He is strong. We sing this as children, but it is so true to our everyday lives. He is stronger than me in everything. When I feel unworthy- Jesus is worthy. He blesses me with that. When I feel second- be glad that He is my all. There are no firsts, seconds, or thirds with Him. He is it. 

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She Reads Truth| The Gospel Changes Everything

“The Gospel is Jesus Christ. It is His life, death and resurrection.”

My sister works in collegiate ministry. Whenever she meets a new student who wants to be mentored, she (at some point in the first few meetings) asks them what the Gospel means. It’s staggering how many times students, RAISED IN THE CHURCH, cannot answer this question genuinely. Knowing and living the Gospel is the epicenter of a relationship with God. The Gospel changes EVERYTHING.

Now, brothers and sisters, I want to remind you of the gospel I preached to you, which you received and on which you have taken your stand. By this gospel you are saved, if you hold firmly to the word I preached to you. Otherwise, you have believed in vain.

 For what I received I passed on to you as of first importance]: that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures,” 

-1 Corinthians 15: 1-4

I can’t wrap my mind around the Truth, but I know it’s the Truth. I’ve gone through so many classes on the Bible, apologetics, fallacies in the Bible (there are none, btw). I studied biochemistry and evolution for 3 years. Throughout high school I was obsessed with learning about other religions. Each time, after every research project- I always came back to the Gospel. It’s where I find my hope. I can’t fully understand why I believe it (although I can articulate why I don’t believe other things), but the mystery of the Gospel “does not make it less true.”

Things I know: Jesus loves me. Jesus died for me. Jesus rose. I’m called to share the Good News. Jesus is coming back.

I’m excited to start  the plan “This is the Gospel” by “She Reads Truth,” to be reminded of the love, hope, perfection of Jesus. And I hope when someone asks me what the Gospel means, I will be ready with an answer.

I Made A Cake

I have an addiction- it’s called Pinterest. Some days/ weeks I tell myself i can’t ‘pin’ anything new until I’ve tried to do/ make a few of my already pinned pins. Why do I do this? Because I think I like to torture myself.

This past week I tried to make a cake with my friend Taylor. It took 2 days. Note: if your friend doesn’t have a standing mixer, a flour sifter, a scale, and/ or any ingredients- IT’S GOING TO TAKE A LONG TIME. (I think you get where I’m going with this- be prepared. I wasn’t). I also didn’t really read the recipe in it’s entirety the day before or of the baking. So I forgot it was all in metric. Why doesn’t the US use/teach metric!?

But anyway- we attempted it. We tried to make a spice clementine and ricotta cake from Donal Skehan’s Homecooked Kitchen Blog. (Go big or go home, right?) This is what it was suppose to look like:

How was I not going to try to make this gorgeous cake!? (If you need orange blossom water- all groceries stores should have it. I found mine at Whole Foods in the baking aisle.)

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All of the snaps were taken on day 2. I forgot to take pictures with Taylor (there’s one on my Instagram) because we were either laughing too hard, or glaring at the goopy cake batter (or maybe even each other).

Here’s how ours turned out:

Processed with VSCOcam with c1 presetWe gave it a good college try. I iced the sides a bit more before I gave half to Taylor. It tasted amazing! Absolutely delicious.

There’s still a little in my kitchen if anyone wants to try some. 🙂