An Internship of Disappointment

My Backyard
What a misleading, yet true title.

Let me preface this by saying I love Krochet Kids intl. LOVE THEM. LOVE THEIR MODEL. Research them and come to your own conclusion, but I can tell you this: they are awesome.

In Part 1 I wrote that interning was still amazing, after nearly 8 months (by the end of May). And it is, but maybe not in the ways I thought it would be…

I think I expected to come out of this internship knowing so much more about PR/SOCIAL MEDIA or the communications aspect of non-profits. At this point, I don’t feel like I have. My internship consists of doing things I (for the most part) already knew how to do, or research I feel like I’ve already read (but truly do love reading again).

I am sure, in a few months, looking back at this internship I will realize that I have learned a lot about PR/COMMUNICATIONS/SOCIAL MEDIA.

Personally and spiritually I do feel like I’ve gained from this adventure. I’ve learned how necessary daily time with God is and also how much a church to belong to and be involved in is important. God is with you through ALL the terrible times and all the good. He can use my failures and the good together for His glory. I will never be enough and when I’m discouraged I need to look to Him, because even encouragement from other believers is flawed.

Through all the bad, the ugly and the amazing…God is with me and He is good.

I can connect with so many people, and by spending extra time with each person I can love them. But just because I love them, doesn’t mean we’re going to be life-long friends or even hang-out…and I am ok with that. In fact, that’s a whole load less of stress to realize this.

I’m disappointed that I let myself think this internship and this time in my life was to only grow in my knowledge of non-profits, companies and communication positions. I’m disappointed that I didn’t do those things too. I think most of all I’m disappointed that I forgot why I was out here. I am at KKi because I believe in them, their model and the ladies in Uganda and Peru.

My heart hasn’t been that of a servant during my time here. I haven’t always enjoyed this internship (and that’s ok), but I should have remembered why I was doing it. Blogging, tweeting, organizing, dishes…those all need to be done. And they need to be done so that people are informed about KKi. People need to be informed so that more ladies can be employed. The more ladies that are employed the more their villages are impacted and the more lives changed. THAT’S what I needed to remember this whole internship. Too bad it’s almost over and I’ve only now just remembered that.

I don’t think I’ve learned anything revolutionary during this internship, but maybe that was good. Maybe it was good to slow life down and chill. After an intense year, it was nice to sit. Be still. Lay out on the beach. Do what I knew how to do.

I’m ready to challenge myself. To go and break expectations. To dream. To inspire and be inspired.


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